More than passion! More than agony! It's love! [shouen-ai / yaoi]

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More than passion! More than agony! It's love! [shouen-ai / yaoi]

Ice_angel_234 Deconectat

I love yaoi

Răspunsuri: 148
Subiecte: 6
Data înregistrării: Jul 2008
Reputație: 32
Zupi: 1.422 z

15-08-2008, 01:11 PM

Ai pus continuarea,ce bine!!!!E frumos capitolul acesta,dar am gasit cateva greseli de tastare
1)vocea lui raspuna -vocea lui rasuna
2)appreciate mai mult -apreciate mai mult...
3)team ape care -teama pe care...
4)sip e care nu -si pe care nu...
5)totusi penmtru el era -totusi pentru el era...
E mai sunt ele cateva,dar sunt mici si nu are rost sa le mai enumar.In rest nu am nimic de comentat.Ai descriere suficienta,la fel si dialog,dar e cam scurt capitolul.Abea astept nextu,sper sa fie un pic mai lung si sa-l pui repede.

Gambate!Ja ne^

I love yaoi fic because is hot and sexy!!!

http://i280.photobucket.com/albums/kk183...tion-8.jpg
[Imagine: gravitation-8.jpg]

, chibi-ul lui Ice_angel_234

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Răspunsuri în acest subiect

More than passion! More than agony! It's love! [shouen-ai / yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 13-08-2008, 02:41 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de deidara-chan4ever - 13-08-2008, 03:19 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de Ice_angel_234 - 13-08-2008, 03:20 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 15-08-2008, 08:35 AM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de Ice_angel_234 - 15-08-2008, 01:11 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de zoey - 15-08-2008, 10:44 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 16-08-2008, 03:03 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de Ice_angel_234 - 16-08-2008, 03:31 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 26-08-2008, 08:54 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de MisS.sAdiStic - 26-08-2008, 09:42 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de Ice_angel_234 - 26-08-2008, 11:50 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 30-08-2008, 04:07 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de Ice_angel_234 - 31-08-2008, 11:33 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de ony-chy - 08-09-2008, 02:02 AM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 27-10-2008, 10:41 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de adyna_45 - 28-10-2008, 05:58 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de Utlaning - 28-10-2008, 08:03 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 17-12-2008, 10:01 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de nolazy - 17-12-2008, 11:22 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de dark_angel_princess - 20-12-2008, 04:43 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 24-01-2009, 08:22 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de nolazy - 25-01-2009, 12:22 AM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de bastard_in_love - 26-04-2009, 07:25 PM

RE: More than passion! More than agony! It's love![shouen-ai/yaoi] - de love_anime - 26-04-2009, 08:22 PM

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