21-05-2011, 01:37 PM
In sfarsit next`ul.. Nu stiu de ce dar mi se pare ca am mai citit odata capitolul asta..Ma rog.,. Deja-vu ! Mi s`a parut actiunea putin grabita, dialogul nu este sec, naratiunea si descrierea se impletesc. Greseli de tastare/exprimare nu am observat.
Consider, ca ar fi trebuit sa pui putin mai mult accent pe sentimentele lor, nu sunt destul de bine creionate, nu reiese ceea ce ar fi trebuit sa exprime aceea stare a Sakurei.
In rest... Nu stiu.. Multa inspiratie si astept next`ul !
:X
Consider, ca ar fi trebuit sa pui putin mai mult accent pe sentimentele lor, nu sunt destul de bine creionate, nu reiese ceea ce ar fi trebuit sa exprime aceea stare a Sakurei.
In rest... Nu stiu.. Multa inspiratie si astept next`ul !
:X
I wanna feel that i`m love.. ♥
I wanna feel you.. ♥
I`m laying down on the floor, ♥
I can`t believe I`m alone.. ♥
I`m begging you on my knees, ♥
Please come back, come to me ! ♥
I feel the beat of your heart, ♥
To stay away, be apart ! ♥
I want, I need you so much. ♥
All my love, all my love, all my love is on fire, ♥
Like the sun, like the sun, like the rain down on me ! ♥
I wanna feel you.. ♥
I`m laying down on the floor, ♥
I can`t believe I`m alone.. ♥
I`m begging you on my knees, ♥
Please come back, come to me ! ♥
I feel the beat of your heart, ♥
To stay away, be apart ! ♥
I want, I need you so much. ♥
All my love, all my love, all my love is on fire, ♥
Like the sun, like the sun, like the rain down on me ! ♥