27-12-2009, 05:18 PM
uuuh...si un capitol hentai ;;).
poi sa vedem...in primul rand ai descris foarte bine totul, in special aceea scena mai fierbinte;;), dialogul a continut replici bine alese si pe deoparte comice, iar actiunea a decurs lin ^^, iar greseli de tastare nu am vazut :-?...
m-a uimit cat curaj a avut Hinata si a facut primul pas in asta mai ales ca ea era foarte timida, dar hei! dragostea schimba oamenii:X; totusi nu mi-a placut reactia lui Naruto de a doua zi, adica nu stiu mi s-a parut cam rece o.O...
Enfin...stii doar ca ador felul ta de a scrie!:X
astept urmatorul capitol!>:D<
kissu&byeeeeee
poi sa vedem...in primul rand ai descris foarte bine totul, in special aceea scena mai fierbinte;;), dialogul a continut replici bine alese si pe deoparte comice, iar actiunea a decurs lin ^^, iar greseli de tastare nu am vazut :-?...
m-a uimit cat curaj a avut Hinata si a facut primul pas in asta mai ales ca ea era foarte timida, dar hei! dragostea schimba oamenii:X; totusi nu mi-a placut reactia lui Naruto de a doua zi, adica nu stiu mi s-a parut cam rece o.O...
Enfin...stii doar ca ador felul ta de a scrie!:X
astept urmatorul capitol!>:D<
kissu&byeeeeee
My fic:
Predestined paths : http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php?tid=13338
[naruto]Teenagers : http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php?tid=13050 (finish
)
![[Imagine: anime-kiss.jpg]](http://www.freelayouticons.com/extended/anime-kiss.jpg)
Predestined paths : http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php?tid=13338
[naruto]Teenagers : http://animezup.com/forum/showthread.php?tid=13050 (finish
)I wish to meet you again next time
Love is more selfish the deeper it gets
until you want to tie each breath down
unreasonable, yet...
We climb a spiral of light
the red memory is a poisonous tattoo
a tattoo that shows the future's chaos
if we're together, until we shatter
Love is more selfish the deeper it gets
until you want to tie each breath down
unreasonable, yet...
We climb a spiral of light
the red memory is a poisonous tattoo
a tattoo that shows the future's chaos
if we're together, until we shatter